The new turf for rude, offensive behavior is texting. Yes, texting has its hazards. One, it lacks voice and body clues to guide us, and two, word brevity can be faulty.
As texts are meant to be informal and expeditious, texters often bypass punctuation, use shortcuts, and pay little attention to spelling and grammar. What results is raw, unfiltered text, leaving the text open to scrutiny. It’s easier than emails to misunderstand the tone of texts. A text can become a minefield, sometimes exploding in both the receiver’s and sender’s faces. That’s why most texts are best for mundane messages like “See you at 6!” and “I got home safely.”
One strategy, especially if the issue is a bit touchy or high emotions are involved, is the “pause” approach. Take a deep breath, then re-read the message. Who are you texting? What tone do you want to convey? How are they likely to react? And, is this text the best way to go?
More Texting Tips:
• Don’t constantly check for texts. Be attentive and engage with those around you.
• Unless a recipient has your number, identify yourself at the front of your text: “Hello. This is your neighbor, Joe.”
• No texting at weddings, funerals, church, plays, etc. It conveys boredom and indifference. Texting in front of others is like whispering to a friend.
• Unless the recipient and you have an established pattern, avoid emojis, shorthand and lingo. LOL may mean “Lots of Love” to you but “Laughing Out Loud” to someone else.
• If you’re hesitant about how a text will land, try calling instead. You can determine the state of the receiver, see if the timing is good, convey more depth, answer questions and work through grey areas that are unseen via texts.
• There’s a time and place for everything so be aware of when, where and how best to text.
• Be aware of time zones; don’t send texts in the middle of the night. Some do not silence their phones.
• When texting in company, tell others you’re checking on something for the benefit of everyone.
• Don’t use texts to represent your business or to relay important family news. Call or email.
• Texting is supposed to be quick, right? But a person is not always able to reply right away. Texting them repeatedly is not appreciated.
• No texting while driving. Never. Ever. Ever.
To Text or Not to Text?!?
Texts are great for expressing a quick, informal thought but they have limitations. If you just need a copy of Aunt Bea’s recipe for roasting a turkey, texting is fine. If someone in the family got injured, a phone call is in order. If you want to share a funny dog video, text the link. If you’re having an emergency, call or text: I NEED HELP! CALL ME!
Think of texts as intros or follow-ups to a conversation. If the subject matter is touchy or emotions are involved, a call or in-person chat is preferable. In a calmer moment, it may accomplish more and with less backlash.
